True love experienced in the golden forest heals everything.

Aaah, the joy of retold fairy tales.
"Our parents have died of smallpox! What shall we do?"
"Come live in our manor!"
"Your mother says this boquet will never die, like my love for you."
AAAAGH, SO CORNY!!!
"Snow" was so much better.
Time to put a hold on other retellings. Hopefully there will be ones as good as "Beastly", "Snow", and "The Rose and the Beast".
"Wasteland", by Francesca Lia Block, is really sad. I don't want to give away the ending, but I don't know, is it still incest?
Mwahaha, I have a playlist called "Underrated Love songs". Trying to put it in exactly the right order.
Lol, I'm posting the first Pony Pals book in a month and a half. Yeah, I've been sort of...preoccupied.
Every time think I see you, I won't forget that nobody else could ever do what you did to me on that night I saw you there, so unexpected. I could care less who else was there, I've been infected, so infected by you.
Another cheesy song with Trevor's horrible phrasing.

Hold up, wait a minute...

PUT A LITTLE LOVE IN IT!
I have no idea why i'm listening to this song...
I was reading my giant and entirely satisfying book of fairy tales, but there are some things that just bother me.
Things That Are Wrong With Fairytales
1. Why are the heroines/damsels always perfect? "There was a little girl/princess/babe and she was beautiful and cheerful and perfect and everyone loved her so much that they named the village after her and her name was revered in all history books from then on, even though she'd never done anything significant except for being beautiful and cheerful and perfect."
Even Sleeping Beauty started out flawed until those stupid fairies came and perfected her.

2. Actually, Sleeping Beauty was kind of a ditz. "La la la, I shall go up to the tallest, darkest, gloomiest tower and poke sharp objects!" She definitely didn't win that prince over with her brains.

3. It said that the Three Bears thought their porridge was too hot, so they went on a walk to wait for it to cool. Yet Papa Bear's is still hot when Goldilocks gets there? Was his like molten lava to begin with? And how is Mama Bear's ice cold? Is she crazy or was it opposite day or...???

4. ESPECIALLY IF THE PORRIDGE CAME FROM THE SAME BATCH!!!

5. I dunno. Magic bowls??

6. Ugh. Little Red Riding Hood is stupid, too. And perfect. "Everyone loved her, bla bla bla bla." If she'd lived in MY village, I would've beat her up. A perfect little red hooded girl is just too intimidating.

7. And how did the hunter know the wolf had eaten the old chick and her granddaughter? Well, stupid question, but HOW DID HE KNOW HOW TO GET THEM OUT? Is he like the master surgeon or something?

8. Wouldn't the wolf have died as soon as they cut him open? Or not DIE, but wouldn't like 25 vital organs have been destroyed in the process? And cutting through bone? HELLO? BROTHERS GRIMM?

9. "But the rocks were so heavy that he fell down dead." WHY? Well, actually, no idea why, but it wasn't because they were HEAVY, genius.

10. I never really liked the story of "The Three Billy Goats Gruff". It was kind of dumb. And in this book the story was ultra condensed. It was only A PAGE LONG. WITH MINIMUM ILLUSTRATIONS! Just so dumb. Hate.

11. On the giantess in "Jack and the Beanstalk": wouldn't she get it by now? "The last boy was a thief, but you look nice." "The last two boys were thieves, but you look nice." Not only is it the SAME GUY, but doesn't this prove that you're really stupid about little boys??? "I only got robbed the last two times, and you're the same height, gender, and species. Come on in!" And as Lachlan would say: "And stay a while!"

Yeah. What happened? I got all cynical. LIKE ASHLEY WILKES STOCKINGDALE! Aaah.
You know, "Luv Addict" could really be about drugs.
"No," you say. "That's not true. They're just joking! It's really about love, not drugs!"
And "Candy Shop" isn't about sex...

Boiling da bunny

Wah. I basically spent all of my day on the computer and doing Washington State History homework. I need to finish everything by TOMORROW.
Aaah.
Ew. So THAT'S what they're referring to.
Bunny boiler. Ew.
Ew. So gross.
And sad. I keep picturing Luke up there.
Who doesn't love Cas Haley? Seriously, though.
NEED MY FAIRY TALES BOOK.
Aaah. Scary.
In my Lion King piano book, there is the most amazing arrangement of "Can You Feel the Love Tonight". I was like, "Woooow." Cuz it's challenging, but fun and really pretty.
I'm going to wear my Evanescence shirt tomorrow. Yay!
Nathan and William took Sorting Hat quizzes. William's a Hufflepuff (but he says, "No, I'm RAAAAVENCLAW!" Whatever. Can you picture William as a Ravenclaw?) and Nathan's a Gryffindor.
How did Percy get in Gryffindor? He sold out his family. Jerk.
Hahaha. I got a stick from outside, peeled off the bark, and painted it black with black nail polish. It's so sweet. It's my "wand" now.

Silicon Valley: Where everyone has fake boobs

You Are 75% Addicted to Blogthings

You lead the pack when it comes to posting Blogthings. And your friends (mostly) thank you for it. It's cute that you insist on being called your Japanese name. Just stop bragging about your IQ score!

How Addicted To Blogthings Are You?

I think this is the result I got last time. Nuff said.
I want to wear my Evanescence T-shirt. Hehehe.
Yeah. I spent the day at home, not wanting to go to school, working of stupid WA St history homework. Tomorrow's my last day and I have one more test to finish. And I'm only on CHAPTER 21!! ARGH! I think I can do it, but it's SO TEDIOUS.
WHO CARES WHY THE WPPSS MOTHBALLED THE POWER PLANTS??? MAYBE BECAUSE THEY COST 24 BILLION DOLLARS! OH NO, I ACTUALLY LEARNED SOMETHING!!!! AAAAGH!
"The Boyfriend List" actually takes place in Seattle, which is cool, so I listened to that while working (it was a book on tape). Except the end was thoroughly depressing and added even more to my minorly depressed funk. And I'm trying to read "Thr3e", which is the most boring book on the face of the planet, and "What A Girl Wants", which is about some 31-year-old single chick who's really rich and happens to be a Christian, but she can't get guys, and she ridicules guys who are single, saying, "You could be having sex by now instead of watching sci-fi movies!" So basically it's me all grown up, as a lawyer (blaaaah, puke, excuse me while I VOMIT!), living in *ahem* SILICON VALLEY. WTH?? And everyone there is an engineer. So Nathan is going to move there, I already live there, and I pray William will escape and decide not to become a lead singer like he wants to be (hello, no one in our family can sing. Well, sure, on tune, but he's no Sammy Hagar and I'm no Amy Lee.) and become an artist or a computer programmer and help me adopt children, even though as a patent lawyer (again, puking...) I HAVE AN AUDI AND A PRADA BAG!!!
*phew*
Anyways.
I need to read a bunch of books, the library is dumb, am totally digging out that fairy tale book with the SHWEET illustrations.
Revelation: Is shweet just as bad as saying smexy? I don't say smexy, I hate saying smexy, smexy is officially the dumbest word ever, but does saying shweet make me a hypocrite???
Totally debating right now.
In the mean time, let them eat cake, eat, drink, and be merry, go have lots of little babies, and write apples. Crap, 7th grade flashback.

Horribly N'ever Over

I have listened to so much "Infinity on High" over the past few weeks.
AAAAAAAAAAAAGH my mom left me and William alone to eat lots of junk food (i mean, Mcdonalds for dinner is pretty sweet) and watch movies. He's watching "Teen Titans: Trouble in Tokyo" or whatever. I think I'll watch it later. I'm just not in a Teen Titany mood.
We just watched "Happily N'ever After".
That is one of the worst movies I have ever seen.
Oh. My. Goodness. Let me make this into a huge deal and a big review. YAY, REVIEW!1

"Happily N'ever After"
Starring the voice talents of: Sarah Michelle Gellar (>:P), Freddie Prinze, Jr. (double >:P), Andy Dick, Wallace Shawn, etc....

Plot: Two wizards assistants have to keep "the scales of good and evil" balanced or NO ONE WILL GET THEIR HAPPY ENDING!!!! GASP! Wait, question. Why can't they just overbalance it to the good side? Because whenever it's overbalanced on the BAD side, bad things happen, but when it's balanced, everything's cool. What would happen if you overbalanced it on the GOOD side. But my question is never answered. Anyway, Munk and Mambo have to keep the scales balanced, but then FRIEDA, the evil stepmother, steals the wizard's staff, takes over, hires a bunch of bad guys, and tries to kill Cinderella, who has to find the prince with the help of hot emo kitchen boy Rick, WHO WANTS HER BODY BUT SHE DOESN'T NOTICE, UNH-UH. Ooooooh, I wonder how this one ends...

1. What is up with Ella's hair? I hate to be cliche, but Cinderella and fairy tale heroines usually have beautiful, voluptuous hair. And I totally like the dark-haired herione thing going on, but again, she just didn't fit. And she wasn't that pretty.

2. Also, whatever happened to modern day feminists? Cinderella is a total WIMP. The whole time, she's all, "OMG! WE NEED THE PRINCE! WHERE IS THAT LOVABLE HUNK OF...LOVABLE HUNKYNESS???" And she finally learns to shoot down witches using diamonds...with a lot of annoying gasping going on. "Oh! Gasp! Gasp! Gaspy gasp gasp!" AAAAAAgh! Sarah Michelle Gellar sucks.

3. Now, about Rick; he is very hot for an animated character. It's just that...OMG, FREDDIE PRINZE, JR. HAS THE MOST ANNOYING VOICE I HAVE EVER HEARD! He's all perfect and manly and stuff...and then he speaks. AAAAAGH. And he was SO EMO the whole TIME. "He's a prince! What's your problem? You need to get outta here. I'm sick of you."

4. And of course he has a huge crush on Ella. And she don't want him back, oh no.

5. Speaking of Rick and annoying, he tried to "play it cool" with the guards. His, "I'm only tryinna put money in yo pocket, playa," stunned me into silence for about 10 minutes.

6. Um...how come the prince is all ugly and yet all the girls like him? Strange, I encounter this in real life. But seriously, the prince looks like John Kerry's son (only he's been working out) and Rick looks like........a really hot cartoon character. If I were a cartoon character girl, I would totally go for Rick.

7. And the whole Patrick Warburton doing the voice of a stupid character is getting old. Scratch that, it was old a long time ago. I think after "The Emperor's New Groove".

8. I still hate Sarah Michelle Gellar.

9. OH OH! there was a VERY funny deleted scene in which Rick stares into a shiny silver tray and says in his Freddie voice, "I don't care how she feels about me. I love her and I'm going to do whatever it takes to save her." I thought it was funny. It was just really emo.

10. Lol, my favorite scene was when the dwarves are battling the wolves. I just liked it when Bubba said, "hey, that was my big toe!" That was the only time I laughed during the entire movie.

Man, I had a whole review. This sucks.
Oh well.
I've forsaken the Willow idea.
Yay, Saturday tomorrow.
OH YEAH!

11. At the end, Rick is all. "So what is happily ever after? I don't know, but I'm going to find out." WAS THAT NOT A SEXUAL REFERENCE OR WHAT? Those weren't the exact words, but it showed him with Ella watching fireworks and I don't know, it sounded fishy to me.

yeah. that's it.

Valiant is the word that basically describes me, and that LAME Holly Black book I got from the library, she is so dumb, what's her problem?

Holly Black is such a loser. Believes WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY too seriously in fairies.
Then again, I totally used to, too. But that was then, this is now.
Apparently fairies are like a Satanist symbol?
Whatever. Just because Wiccans totally go for that doesn't mean all fairy literature is demonized.
And Wiccans aren't always Satanist.
Wait.
Hold on.
Okay, from a Christian standpoint, it could be said that they are.
But that's the "POD isn't a Christian band, and I'm a Bible-thumper" standpoint.
DANG IT, it's like, I don't want to get all in your face and prove the world's stereotype of Christians, but come on, that REALLY bothers me, so how do I say it in a nice way without making myself seem more tolerant than I really am?
Because I want to be loving, not just tolerant, but I also want to be moral and let everyone know where I stand.
Wow. Why is life so complicated?
Whatever. By the way, why is everyone always asking me my stand on gay marriage, or bringing it up every five minutes and then glaring at me because the know I don't agree. It's not like I'm against gay people: they're just not normal people, your sexuality doesn't define you, so screw everyone who says it DOES, but I don't agree with their practices (as in being gay and proud), just like I don't agree with my dad's relatives some of the time, but I don't SHUN them, I actually like them more than my other family sometimes because they're so COOL and nice and they live in pimp states.
Enough on that.
We have another game tomorrow. Against Kingston. Wooooo. We're probably going to lose. I jammed my finger on Monday, and it was purple, but now it's GREEN with purple spots and it doesn't hurt, it's just really swollen and grossed a bunch of people out. I CAN'T HELP IT, I have BIG FEET, and I TRIPPED, causing my hand to become very friendly with the floor.
Who knew how much you use your pinky on a day to day basis? The first day it was jammed, it hurt like heck and I couldn't DO anything, which was annoying.
I just read a book about peaches. It was even called "Peaches". It was okay, pretty good, I did like it, and the coolest character was the most messed up, so I didn't really relate to her, but she was cool like that. And her name was Murphy??? And it took place in Georgia.
I really want a papillon. Or a dog of some sort. Really bad.
There must be something called dog therapy. I know there's horse therapy. If we could even RENT a dog, or take CARE of a dog, I would be soooooooooo happy. Especially if it was a collie. Or a papillon. Or, dare I say it, a Golden Retriever. Those things are so cliche, EVERYONE has one, but I do like them, because all my weird Oregon relatives have one and bring them to the fourth of July so they can lick the babies and run around and be annoying.
WHY do my relatives ALWAYS bring their dogs to fourth of July? Which is dumb, because we always took Oggy, but it was such a PAIN, because during the big picnic, we either had to hold him or tie him up with the other dogs and he would bark and fall down the cliff sometimes, so we had to go down to the beach and pick him back up and hold him AGAIN. And the dogs always bite people, like that stupid dog Prince, and I wasn't even related to those people, not even distantly, so I don't know WHAT they were doing on Dory's property, but he bit this kid's arm and he cried. The kid, not Prince. So I kicked him, I think. Even that kid got on everyone's nerves.
I feel like a cupcake. The special kind that my aunt makes that are chocolate and cream cheese. Ooooooooh yeaaaaaaah.