You can take that Occupational credit and shove it up your...

I've had my retainers for more than a year.
They told me the longest I would have my retainers for was a year.
Apparently they lied.
I went to my appointment today thinking I'd FINALLY get my retainers OFF.
Then the stupid dental assistant sits down and starts talking about how I'll never have to make any more appointments with them.
Ever. Again.
So I started to perk up a little bit.
Then she went on to say that I should continue wearing my retainers for the rest of my life.
Or, as she jokingly put, until I no longer want straight teeth!
Ha! Ha! Ha.
What?
Yep. I have to wear my retainers FOREVER.
Does this mean my orthodontist was INCOMPETENT?
"We couldn't PERMANENTLY straighten your teeth, but we came pretty darn close, now, didn't we?" *flashes brilliant smile*
I didn't realize teeth were a lifetime commitment.
I mean, sure, you have to brush them and floss them and whatnot.
But that's just basic hygiene. It would be gross, not to mention UNHEALTHY, if you didn't take care of your teeth.
But there was no REAL reason for me to get braces in the first place, besides the fact that my teeth were crooked.
I wouldn't have DIED because of them. I could chew JUST FINE.
My parents made me get braces anyway.
It's so stupid! It's just about looks!
Straight teeth wouldn't be so important if we hadn't created orthodontia in the first place.
God gave you those crooked teeth, why change that?
I didn't think my teeth looked bad at all! I LIKED my smile!
But I've spent 6 and a half years expanding my jaw, removing teeth, and correcting my overbite in order to fix a smile I didn't dislike in the first place.
Sure, on my parents dime.
But it sure seems like a waste of money.
And, speaking of looks, it's not like I look ANY BETTER with straight teeth then I did with crooked teeth.
It doesn't change the fact that I have acne or that my arms are hairy or that since acquiring boobs I've become a bit chunky.
In fact, if my parents had offered to pay to fix THOSE things, I wouldn't have minded so much.
The orthodontist clearly expected me to be overcome with joy at this news.
"Congratulations! You've graduated from orthodontia!"
"Whoop-de-do. I'll still have your equipment in my mouth for the rest of my life."
"....have a nice day!"
So I threw a temper tantrum in the car and somehow broke my retainer case.
My retainers, sadly, were unharmed.
So now I have retainers AND a broken case to contend with.
I refuse to wear them. There's no point.
But my mom won't let me throw them away.
Fine. I'll just smash them to little bitty bits.
On a positive note: assuming I pass all my classes this year (ha), I only need 4 more credits to graduate.
That means all the electives I want!
Ha! At least my senior year will be fun...