More than useless...but less than useful

AAARGH, I AM TRYING, OKAY!!! I AM TRYING TO BE TALKATIVE AND NICE AND LESS ALOOF AND INTIMIDATING!! BUT I CAN'T!!!
I can play the whole game with adults. I can be polite, talk to them, say all the right things without seeming...I don't know, in some way bad.
But when it comes to people my own age, I CAN'T. My throat LITERALLY dries up and nothing will come out!!
Take this morning for instance:
I'm sitting there in Pastor Mike's office with my dad, eating a really delicious chocolate chip granola bar, and it really was the tastiest thing I'd had all morning. Someone my age comes in and strikes up conversation (okay, he was talking to my dad, but still), and bam. I can't talk, I feel all nervous, and if I take one more bite of granola bar, I'll puke.
Which sucks, cuz I was REALLY hungry.
So it's just not going to work. I'll stick with the friends I have, thanks.
Other than that, church was pretty amazing. My dad and I played in the horn section on worship team. Then there was a guest speaker, who was talking about getting "really passionate", so that was cool.
Then there's a Pie fellowship tonight, which should be fun, because there's pie, but it's like a church marathon, seeing as we already spent 6 hours there.
Mwahahaha, I never have to go to Sunday School again.
Moving on from church.
Lol, "The Last Pony Ride" looks pretty amazing. I hear Mike breaks things off with Tommy.
Whoo, Lego Star Wars!!

This is no place to try and live my life

Have you ever realized that you seem a certain (negative) way to some people, and feel badly that they think of you like that, but do nothing to change their minds?
For example, if you came off as a really intolerant or snobby individual, and people look down on you or think badly of you, but you're not REALLY intolerant OR snobby (intentionally) how many of you would actually make an effort to be nicer?
My dad thinks watching wrestling while playing hymns on the flute is sort of sacreligious. How could it be; there was wrestling the in the Bible!
I got the second Faith Thomas book at the library. Nellie is such a horrible friend! "You've got to choose me or Niles. I'm going to let you think about it, and you can tell me tomorrow. Bye!" And she's thinking about "taking the next step" with a boy named Ethan. ETHAN?? What happened to Trevor Fish? The one she cried over at the homecoming dance? Whatever. Joy broke her nose and hurt her foot, apparently. Ew, some 20-year-old drummer is all, "Oh, gosh, are you Jake Thomas' younger sister?" She's his daughter!!! But Faith totally falls for it.
"Take On Me" by A-Ha is the best song in the entire world.
Except when the Jonas Brothers try it.
OMG, and "Forever Young", from Napoleon Dynamite!