You can take that Occupational credit and shove it up your...

I've had my retainers for more than a year.
They told me the longest I would have my retainers for was a year.
Apparently they lied.
I went to my appointment today thinking I'd FINALLY get my retainers OFF.
Then the stupid dental assistant sits down and starts talking about how I'll never have to make any more appointments with them.
Ever. Again.
So I started to perk up a little bit.
Then she went on to say that I should continue wearing my retainers for the rest of my life.
Or, as she jokingly put, until I no longer want straight teeth!
Ha! Ha! Ha.
What?
Yep. I have to wear my retainers FOREVER.
Does this mean my orthodontist was INCOMPETENT?
"We couldn't PERMANENTLY straighten your teeth, but we came pretty darn close, now, didn't we?" *flashes brilliant smile*
I didn't realize teeth were a lifetime commitment.
I mean, sure, you have to brush them and floss them and whatnot.
But that's just basic hygiene. It would be gross, not to mention UNHEALTHY, if you didn't take care of your teeth.
But there was no REAL reason for me to get braces in the first place, besides the fact that my teeth were crooked.
I wouldn't have DIED because of them. I could chew JUST FINE.
My parents made me get braces anyway.
It's so stupid! It's just about looks!
Straight teeth wouldn't be so important if we hadn't created orthodontia in the first place.
God gave you those crooked teeth, why change that?
I didn't think my teeth looked bad at all! I LIKED my smile!
But I've spent 6 and a half years expanding my jaw, removing teeth, and correcting my overbite in order to fix a smile I didn't dislike in the first place.
Sure, on my parents dime.
But it sure seems like a waste of money.
And, speaking of looks, it's not like I look ANY BETTER with straight teeth then I did with crooked teeth.
It doesn't change the fact that I have acne or that my arms are hairy or that since acquiring boobs I've become a bit chunky.
In fact, if my parents had offered to pay to fix THOSE things, I wouldn't have minded so much.
The orthodontist clearly expected me to be overcome with joy at this news.
"Congratulations! You've graduated from orthodontia!"
"Whoop-de-do. I'll still have your equipment in my mouth for the rest of my life."
"....have a nice day!"
So I threw a temper tantrum in the car and somehow broke my retainer case.
My retainers, sadly, were unharmed.
So now I have retainers AND a broken case to contend with.
I refuse to wear them. There's no point.
But my mom won't let me throw them away.
Fine. I'll just smash them to little bitty bits.
On a positive note: assuming I pass all my classes this year (ha), I only need 4 more credits to graduate.
That means all the electives I want!
Ha! At least my senior year will be fun...

Sacrifice one...

...for the lives of many.
Seriously, it was the only way.
Barton could let Marilyn stay, rather than sending her out into her doom, but then they both would have died, and they would wouldn't have gotten to the sick men in time, resulting in a total of 8 deaths.
He also could have sacrificed himself, but then MARILYN would have had to fly the ship, and the EDS was on a tight schedule, so why would it be good to kill yourself for one girl when other people need you?
And Marilyn was a STOWAWAY, which is pretty much ILLEGAL, and for which the stowaway was condemned to death in the law.
So maybe it wasn't completely fair, but there were consequences for the choice she made.
Although she WAS a really nice person and didn't deserve to have her lungs ripped through her chest.

You Are 45% Pirate

Ahoy matey! Ye can think o' yerself as a swashbuckler in trainin'. If ye study hard an 'do what the captain tells ye, ye may be gettin' part o' the booty. Get to work on yer pillagin', swordfightin', an' drinkin'. Ye dasn't want to end up in Davy Jones' locker, so make sure ye pipe down when the captain be around.

Would You Make a Good Pirate?

Argh argh argh. So kind of a crappy day.
I'm having MAJOR PMS.
That, and the weather is crappy and Washington-like, and I'm still sick, and I went to the orthodontist and I'll be wearing these retainers for-freaking-ever, and we had the LAMEST assembly during advisory today.
Uggggh.
But I'm mostly mad about the stupid orthodontist thing. AAAAARGH IT'S BEEN 6 FREAKING YEARS SINCE I STARTED "TREATMENT" I WANT TO BE DONE!!
But noooooooooooo, I have to wear these retainers for another 8 MONTHS.
If braces are so expensive, why did my parents MAKE me get them if they need the money?
And if they didn't need the money then, they could have at least gotten me a pony.
Stop Global Warming...
...or all the Reese's will melt!

888...the number of the beast?

Ha, Iron Maiden is too cool.
Yeah, today is 8/8/08 and I'm freaking out right now.
Cuz that's pretty cool.
If you're a nerd like me.
Here I sit, sporting my brand new WSU T-shirt. It looks pretty sweet, if I do say so myself.
Tie is almost back to normal, I think. She's still depressed and itchy (probably because she misses Nathan; she did pee on his bed), but she went on two walks and played tug-of-war for about 2 seconds before the next mood swing hit.
*shakes head* Girls.
Iliza Schlesinger won "Last Comic Standing"!!! Wow, who knew? It was between her and Marcus, and she pulled it off. And she's the first woman to win...EVER.
Last night's finale was sort of lame, though. They had Jon Reep, John Lovitz, and some guy off E! perform. Jon Reep was funny, as always. I still love it when he says "Hickory".
But Bill Belamy and Fearne Cotton didn't really have anything to do, so they compromised by telling stupid jokes (Bill), making loud screeching noises (Bill), forcing laughter at all the comics' jokes (Fearne), making weird hand gestures (also Fearne), and looking awkward (again, Fearne).
GROSS, I looked in the mirror without my retainers on and I looked like Demi Lovato!!
No, that's not a good thing!!
But when I showed off my hideous new teeth and turned my head to the side, I WAS Demi Lovato!
Only, you know, taller and myopic.
We even have the same really large cleft chin and bangs!
WHAT IS GOING ON????
It kind of screwed up my entire day.
Because I went through 6 years of dental torture so they could make me look like Demi Lovato.
So no, Mom, I don't think this stupid braces business was worth it AT ALL.
I have half a mind NOT to wear these stupid retainers.
But, of course, I only have half a mind.

Smile, it's the end of the world!

I GOT MY BRACES OFF!!
And, somehow, it doesn't seem worth it.
All my teeth are really big and white and straight like little tombstones, but it really doesn't look all that attractive.
And I never smile with my mouth open, so what's the point?
And now I have to wear two retainers.
Yeah, TWO.
And they make it a little hard to talk.
And I have to wear them all the time.
This reminds me of the rubber band fiasco.
But they DID fund a trip to Coldstone for me and my family because they'd run out of caramel apples.
I can be pacified with ice cream.
Coldstone is better than Ferdinand's, I think.
I love Ferdinand's, but they don't have as many creative flavors.
Now I can eat CARAMEL!
After I take out my retainers, anyway.
But it was sort of embarrassing trying to ask my dad for "toaster strudels" and he was like, "What? WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?"
Tie is feeling better today, but she still itches and is sort of listless.
What happened to my sanguine dog?

Zac Efron would be proud.

I really love these jeans. They're all denim-y and faded in the right places...but soft faded, like they're worn in, rather than "obvious acid-wash".
In other news, WE WON OUR FIRST BASKETBALL GAME TODAY!!!! AND I CONTRIBUTED!!!
Okay, it was one freethrow, but STILL!
And the team wasn't even that good (0-3, just like us, only now we're 1-3 and they're 0-4!!!), but STILL!!
We went out knowing we could win and came out ACTUALLY WINNING! BY THREE POINTS!
The refs were a little weird, but I guess they always are. Still, they would call pivots "travels" and called everything a foul, so by the end each team had more than 20 fouls.
Martin Luther King, Jr. was one of the greatest people that ever lived, but I'm having a lot of trouble reading his "I Have a Dream" speech. Maybe because my dad's playing Black Sabbath upstairs. Or because my teeth are all weird.
Agh, speaking of teeth, the orthodontist, idiot that she is, decided I need to wear a cross band, meaning I have to wear a rubber band that crisscrosses across my mouth and prevents me from opening my mouth, talking properly, and eating. I can't even chew gum anymore. It really hurt a while ago, but the Motrin kicked in. The more I wear it, the sooner it comes off, but seriously? I look SO STUPID. Now my bite's all messed up.
Tyler and I need to switch voices so people stop thinking he's gay and I'm a lesbian.
I sort of gave up on Robin McKinley's "Deerskin". It got really boring once she ran away into the forest. I know it's a really good book and all I and could've stuck with it, even during the boring parts, but really? White dress? Silvery dog? Incest? And an implied miscarriage? Not getting it.

,

There is something wrong with the number 14. I swear, it's even more cursed than the number 23. Because life was all good until I turned 14, and now it SUCKS.
WHY?????? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?
WHAT HAVE I EVER DONE TO YOU?
CAN I HAVE AT LEAST ONE EMO GUY OR A TEACHER THAT ACTUALLY GETS ME AND DOESN'T ASSUME I'M A FREAKING MORON?
I think this is becoming a pattern. Every four days or something some stupid emotional trauma strikes.
*shock* LIKE AT MY CHURCH.
Oooooooh, burn, that was mean, I should be nicer...
NOT.
I don't know, maybe it was the orthodontist both tightening my braces AND making me wear stupid rubber bands that make my mouth feel like a war zone: bloody and painful.
Then there was that STUPID basketball game.
And that's mostly why I'm so mad.
My coach didn't play me. At all. Ever. The whole game.
BECAUSE I'M NOT A PART OF THIS STUPID TEAM.
I mean, I'm not exactly NEEDED on the team. I'm obviously not GOOD enough because I didn't MAKE the team in the first place! Two girls had to QUIT before I was even CONSIDERED.
So I'm basically just an 11th wheel.
Oooooooh boy. Hooooow fun.
And it's not like I was annoyed enough already. I'm failing science...AAAAND math...AAAAAAND band.