Aw, fudge.

Mmmm, fudge sounds goooooood.
I took my driver's test today...aaaaaaaand it didn't go so well.
It wasn't even like, "Oh, you missed it by this much!" I failed miserably.
And I knew it.
First thing on the test: PARALLEL PARKING.
I'd had five people tell me it wouldn't be on the test, but I guess I didn't read the pamphlet thoroughly enough, because I had to do it.
That was the first thing I did wrong.
I hit a cone, then tried to pull into the parking spot, but ended up parking NEXT to the spot.
I was completely parallel, too. How did that happen?
So I tried again.
Another epic failure.
My driving instructor, a really nice Guamanean lady, sighed and wearily asked me to re-enter traffic.
Which I did.
For the rest of the test I did fine. I'm a good driver.
Sort of.
Then I had to back around a corner.
I thought I understood her instructions, but apparently I wasn't listening hard enough or my brain malfunctioned, because an instant after she said them I forgot. I started turning my wheels every which way, bumping into the curb, ramming into brick walls, and asking, "Wait, you want me to turn into the driveway? Straight line into the driveway? Oh, turn RIGHT!" So I turned my car left.
She sighed again and asked me to re-enter traffic without killing anybody, which I managed to do.
The atmosphere of the car wasn't a hopeful one. A dark cloud hung over the Le Sabre and her body language boded ill.
But she was really nice about it.
Ed would have berated me and explained every little thing I did wrong and what a bad driver I was, compared to him and every other teenager out there.
Actually, that's kind of what she did.
But the WAY she did it wasn't as mean.
So she left and my dad came back and I had another big fight with him (we'd had one coming into the parking lot, when he decided constructive criticism was the best way to go - right before my test!!!).
He wanted me to go inside the DOL and renew my permit.
At this point, after *cough cough* bravely listening to my instructor tell me just how badly I failed, I couldn't take it anymore was bawling like a baby.
And my dad expected me to go inside, red-eyed and tear-stained, to smile for my permit picture.
That didn't go over well.
So he yelled a lot and I cried and might have cussed him out.
Correction: I did cuss him out.
Which he let go. I was a little surprised. I've never been grounded, but for what I said, I probably should have been.
It was bad.
But my mom bought me flavored Tootsie rolls and let me chill out and get away from people for a little while.
So Tie and I went on a long walk.
We were greatly cheered by cheery mechanics, cute old people, and skeevy old bikers.
The Lance Armstrong kind, not the tough leather-clad variety.
This one rode by me at least 5 times.
The last time he called out, "Good morning," and smirked heartily.
It cracked me up, but I couldn't figure out his motives.
Was he checking me out (unlikely) or trying to prove that he was so much faster than A GIRL WALKING HER DOG?
Congratulations! You can bike 2 miles faster than I can walk them! Good for you! By the way, I'M 16!!!!
He was at least 30.
Maybe even 40.
Ew.

Be dumb! It works!

Excellent book.
Perverted and sort of icky, but at least interesting.
He was 23!!!
Elizabeth Gaskell was (and is) overrated. BBC seems to be in love with her, but she's not that great.
Not that I've actually read her stuff.
But I plan to.
And the movies I've seen based on her work, that apparently stay very true to the books?
Not impressed.
"North and South" was a lot better than "Wives and Daughters".
But it still seemed like she had to pull a rabbit out of a hat to get the desired ending.
And she made all these random subplots that never went anywhere.
Take "North and South" for instance. Her brother is a CRIMINAL and will be KILLED if anyone finds out he's in England. A drunk catches him leaving the train station and almost turns him in, but Fred pushes him down the stairs and he later dies, making Fred not only a mutineer, but a MURDERER.
And, as you're waiting impatiently, wanting to know what will happen to him, Margaret (the main character) makes a side comment about him being happily married in Spain, and that's THAT. You never hear from him again.
Seems like a bunch of unnecessary drama.
Ugh, I HAAAATED Margaret soooooooooooo much. She was like a homeschooler on CRACK - everything she did was offensive, and she made no effort to try to understand people and the Northern culture. And Elizabeth Gaskell's main characters are always praised for speaking their minds in a time when women had no rights and being revolutionary and forthright and whatnot, but you didn't get the impression that Margaret was outspoken or revolutionary - just irritating. And out of ALL the characters, she grew the LEAST. Sure, she changed her opinion about the mill owner, but only because he was so dang attractive (mmmmmhmmm), and every stupid decision she made was justified by her idiot father, even if she disobeyed him by INVITING HER CRIMINAL BROTHER INTO THE COUNTRY!!!!!!!!!!!!
John Thornton was a much better male lead than Roger "Moron" whatever-his-last-name-is.
The ending was really epic. Margaret randomly inherits money from her father's old friend, after EVERYONE ELSE DIES (seriously, at least 6 main characters kick the bucket), and moves back to London.
But, when she's riding away in the carriage after saying goodbye to Thornton, he's watching her go, almost crying, saying, "Look back. Look back at me."
But she doesn't. Because she's an idiot.
Then she moves to London with her gross aunt and her ditzy best friend and the creepy stalker with GROSS sideburns who had been stalking her since the beginning of the movie, and was STILL pouting over her rejecting his proposal!!!
Then Thornton loses the mill, but he and Higgins are best friends, so that's okay. Margaret makes a lot more money and buys the mill and visits Milton, where Thornton's mom chews her out for rejecting HER son as well, and Margaret's like, "Well, he IS rather attractive..."
ANYWAY, the epic part: she's on a train back to London, and Thornton's on a train back to Milton from Helstone (long story), and they both have a delay and their trains end up right next to each other, so they both leap out of the trains and start making out on a bench, while Henry "Gross sideburns" Lennox pouts in his car. Then Margaret goes into the train with Thornton and its a wonderfully happy ending with icky sideburns going home that night - ALONE!
And that's pretty much been my entire Spring Break, so far.
Besides graduating my Sims from college (finally) and spending time at the beach with my family.
My grandparents have been married 57 years. 57 YEARS. That's a long time.
Beaches are awesome. Even when it's a balmy 47 degrees outside with freezing winds.