How bout 8 pounds of cake?

Ha. Jim Gaffigan.
I know bagels are equivalent to 5 pieces of bread, but they're also delicious.
Well, the one I just ate wasn't. It was a little too...sweet.
And it was a plain bagel, not cinnamon or anything, so it the sweetness seemed out of place. Curse you, Sara Lee!
I can't seem to find cinnamon bagels. Not cinnamon raisin, just plain old cinnamon.
And I know they exist, because Mrs. Hamblet bought us a bunch and I ate at least 4.
But that's okay. They were mini bagels.
My mom and I watched "Once Upon a Mattress".
Too cute.
A mute king discussing the birds and the bees with his 40-year-old son?
All the possibilities...
Zooey Deschanel getting knocked up by the guy from "Glee"?
Oh dear. Can't say she didn't deserve it.
My favorite part was the wizard pretending to be the Nightingale of Samarkand.
"Ka ka ka ka ka, ka ka ka ka ka."
And then he got angry!
"KA KA KA, KA KA, KA KA KA, KA KAAAAAAAA!"
He was so cute, on his little swing!
But not as cute as the king, who was an adorable old man until he got his voice back.
Oh dear, I've spoiled the ending. Rats. Might as well spoil everything else.
It wasn't the pea!
It was jousting equipment!
I'm rereading the Harry Potter series for the millionth times.
Meanwhile, I'm trying to make headway in "Les Miserables" (I should just give up), while revisiting the "Peaches" trio and slogging my way through the new Maximum Ride (I really don't want to...curse you, James Patterson, and your political agenda).
The dog is exhausted. We took a long walk, and she got in a fight with a retriever puppy twice her size. But she won, which is all that matters.

Stoopid.

Curse you, Kate Brian.
All of her books are the same.
"Megan Meade's Guide to McGowan Boys" was good.
"The Princess and the Pauper" was unbelievably lame.
I'm not sure exactly how I feel about "Fake Boyfriend".
The idea was pretty funny: two friends create a fake Myspace page for the perfect boy so their best friend will be able to get over her skank ex-boyfriend.
But the ending was SO OBVIOUS.
And Vivi was such a LOSER. Aargh, just a loser control-freak, and she didn't change at all, and Kate Brian tried to make it seem like everything she did (lie to her best friend, insult Johnathan, persecute her supposedly gay brother) was okay because everything worked out in the end. AND she got the guy!!! Aargh. She should have either died in a fiery conflagration or been rejected big time.
Lane was kind of a pushover, but she grew a spine at the end and was all, "Curtis, I love you!" She also told Vivi to screw herself and left her at an airport, which was PRETTY funny.
Isabelle is amazing. They made her seem kind of ditzy, until the end, which was pretty great.
Omg, Marshall. How shocking. And then how shocking again. Shocking everywhere.
Aaargh, every guy in the book was BLONDE. Nothing's wrong with that, but whenever a guy was considered "HAWT", they were blonde with no other distinguishing features. They all sort of blurred together after a bit. I've read books where there's nothing but dark-haired guys and the same thing happens. Also, I was trying to think of famous blonde people so they didn't all look the same, so Johnathan ended up looking like a broad-shouldered Will Pugh.
Curtis was the only guy with brown hair and he was pretty annoying.
I'm hoping to read something less formulaic and frothy.
Or maybe just as formulaic and frothy.
Pony Pals?

My life is a Sarah Dessen novel.

No, seriously, read "The Truth About Forever" and you will see some startling similarities. Aaaagh, alliteration. Okay, maybe I'm the only one seeing them, because Macy (main character) is a BLONDE perfectionist/fast runner, and her dad died, bla bla bla, now her boyfriend's at Brain Camp.... It was pretty drama-y but really nice. Better than that stupid, boring "Keeping the Moon" book (what was up with that? I couldn't finish it) and "Someone like You" (not too bad, I liked it). But this one made me way jealous of a fictitious character. I'm not sure if that's allowed. And it had written IN WORDS exactly what has been driving me insane. Not exactly a clinical diagnosis, but Sarah Dessen IS an award-winning author. Aaargh, Chelsea has another book by her and it has an ipod on the cover. Jealous, I want it.
WHAT IS THE POINT OF "THE MASQUE OF RED DEATH"? Prince throws party, Red Death shows up, and screws everyone over. Yaaay. I know it's supposed to symbolize tuberculosis and whatnot, but it's way boring and not scary at all.
"The Fall of the House of Usher" freaked me out. I was like, "Um, wth, why did you bury your sister?" And I totally did not get the fact that Roderick was a drug addict? What? When did that happen?
Drake is playing the tuba? I am apprehensive about this happening. That means he has to sit by me in my section. Dang it. How will I bother Kevin and Robert now? No more "Are you Nervous". No more mouthpiece stealing. No more making Mr. Faxon mad. Never mind. There will be plenty of that, I'm sure.
FIRE DRILL! I love fire drills. I hate French. I'm failing science. I sort of understand math. My life has turned upside-down.
WHAT IS THE ANSWER TO THE CLUE, TYLER??? It has something to do with "turning back the clock" and past clues. Okay, you know the clue I posted yesterday? Go to these websites and tell me what the similarity is. Actually, just start here and move up from there.